Stop sending me crap

Let's assume, for a second, that you're an environmentally conscious person. You care about ecosystems, and you understand that everything, ever, represents energy or resources taken from somewhere else. Junk mail makes your blood simmer. You recently did a bit of housecleaning. You try to re-use almost everything before it goes in the trash or recycling. It's part of your care for the planet. It's what you do.

You've noticed that in the last year or so, you've received no fewer than six promotional CDs from H&R Block. These get mailed to you periodically in a plastic DVD-sized case. You scratch your little head, you get a little angry. Why did you need six CD's to be sent to your house for no reason? You didn't. Why do they feel the need to use your personal information this way? 'Cause they might make a buck.

You're perturbed by now. But you're a nice person. You conduct business in a civil manner. You have dealt with junk mail before and are aware of some of the frustrations involved. There was also the time when The News Journal wouldn't stop delivering newspapers to your house. You gave them your information, over and over and over. They took your e-mail address and started sending you JUNK E-MAIL. And then didn't stop sending newspapers to your house. Despite half a dozen irate phone calls.

To your credit, you did fix the problem by taping a giant sign to the garage that said "DON'T DELIVER NEWSPAPERS HERE." It was only about 2'x3' and didn't make the neighbors think you were crazy at all. BUT IT WORKED.

Did I mention that you are also someone who runs off on wild tangents sometimes?

Anyway, being the civil-minded environmentalist that you are, and truly believing in the good intentions of people (if not the corporations by which they are employed), you call up H&R Block. Arbitrarily choose some of the options from the automated menu. Explain that you want to be taken off their mailing list. Get asked some mumbled question about W-2's. Re-explain about the mailing list. Hear a mumbled response. Say nothing. Get connected to someone else. Re-explain.

This person seems to know what you want. And you can understand what they're saying, which is a huge plus. They ask for your e-mail. You say that they don't need your e-mail, since you're trying to get OFF their snail-mailing list. (You're also paranoid, thanks to The News Journal.) They put you on hold for 2 minutes. They come back. They ask for name and address. You supply these. They ask for your e-mail. You explain again. THIS TIME, they respond. We need your e-mail, because otherwise how will we know where NOT to send things?

...

...

...

Despite your best efforts, you are really not getting through. But you oblige.

Finally, they think they're done with you. They see the finish line, gleaming up ahead. They can finally get rid of this weird person who hates CD's so much.

You have the ace.

"Well, it's gonna be difficult for you guys to stop sending me things, because you didn't take down my town or state. Do you have that information in your database?"

"...no, ma'am."

They also ask you to spell Delaware.

Which makes you considerably nervous.

Luckily, since you're paranoid, you recorded the whole thing. So when you get the next CD, you can be even more irate.

You know, in a civil kind of way.